Los Angeles, the city that gave us Hollywood, highway traffic as a lifestyle, and some of the worst governance in the history of representative democracy, is at it again. Copper thieves have been ripping the wiring out of streetlights across the city — leaving entire neighborhoods literally in the dark — and the city’s brilliant solution isn’t to, you know, arrest the people stealing copper. No, no. Their solution is to tax the residents whose copper was stolen in the first place. You’re the victim AND the ATM. Welcome to Los Angeles.

I had to read this story three times because I was genuinely convinced it was satire. Criminals steal public infrastructure. The city refuses to prosecute. Then the city sends YOU the bill. It’s like getting mugged, calling the cops, and having them show up to write you a parking ticket. Except in LA, the cops probably wouldn’t show up at all.

Let’s walk through the logic here — and I use the word “logic” with extreme generosity. Los Angeles has a copper theft problem. Thieves are targeting streetlights because copper wire is valuable and, in a city that treats law enforcement like a suggestion, the risk-reward ratio is fantastic. You shimmy up a light pole, yank out some wire, sell it to a scrap yard, and absolutely nothing happens to you. The streetlight goes dark. The neighborhood gets more dangerous. And the cycle continues.

Now, a normal city — a city run by adults — would look at this situation and say, “We need to catch and prosecute these thieves.” Maybe increase patrols in affected areas. Maybe crack down on scrap yards buying stolen copper. Maybe — and this is really thinking outside the box — actually put people in jail when they destroy public property. You know, basic civilization stuff.

But this is Los Angeles. The city where the progressive experiment goes to show America exactly what not to do. So instead of any of that, the city council is proposing a brand new tax on residents to fund streetlight repairs. A tax. On the victims. To fix the damage caused by criminals the city refuses to stop.

I want you to really think about what this means for the people living there. You’re a working family in LA. You already pay some of the highest taxes in the country. Your streets are crumbling. Your schools are mediocre. Homeless encampments line your commute. And now the lights on your block go out because some tweaker stripped the copper at 3 AM — and instead of a cop car showing up, you get a new line item on your tax bill.

This is the social contract in reverse. The government’s most basic job — the absolute bare minimum — is public safety. Keep the lights on. Keep the streets safe. Punish people who steal and destroy. Los Angeles can’t even clear that bar. But taxing you? Oh, they’ve got that part down to a science. They could tax a rock and then tax the shadow it casts.

And here’s the kicker that really makes your blood boil: this isn’t a one-time fix. If you don’t stop the thieves, they’re going to steal the replacement copper too. So this new tax isn’t a repair fund — it’s a subscription service for criminal negligence. You’ll be paying this forever because the city fundamentally refuses to address the actual problem. It’s not a pothole that stays fixed once you fill it. It’s a theft ring that will keep coming back as long as there’s zero consequence.

This is what blue-city governance looks like in 2026. The criminals operate freely. The police are understaffed and demoralized. The DA’s office treats prosecution like a dirty word. And when the entirely predictable consequences of all that permissiveness show up — darkened streets, unsafe neighborhoods, crumbling infrastructure — the city’s answer is always the same: more taxes.

Never more arrests. Never more accountability. Never a moment of honest reflection about whether maybe, just maybe, the soft-on-crime approach isn’t working. Nope. Just more taxes.

You want to know why people are leaving California in droves? This. This story right here. It’s not one big thing — it’s a thousand small insanities stacked on top of each other until normal people can’t take it anymore. You can only get mugged by your own city government so many times before you start looking at real estate in Texas.

The thieves steal. The city shrugs. And you pay. That’s the deal in Los Angeles. That’s the progressive paradise they’ve built — a place where the crime is free but the cleanup costs a fortune, and guess who’s always holding the check?

If you live in LA and this makes you angry, good. It should. And if you don’t live in LA, pay attention — because this is exactly what happens when you let the people who run Los Angeles run anything. They will tax you for their own failures and call it compassion.

The lights are out in LA. And nobody in charge has the sense to turn them back on.